We each create our own worlds. We make our own happiness, our own failures and defeats but more so our own success and victories. In building this world, it is not far off that along the way there will be people who in their own interest, would help us establish this world. It is to them, we will owe a bit here and there, but we will neither forget those who strike at us in this moment of weakness.

It is increasingly frustrating to be suffocating... that these skills can not be used. In our anger, we forget to think. We forget the teachings of our teachers. Our anger we must now channel to a blade of focus and a means to an end.

What of that old cross? We have not found peace that way. It is a crisis, we must deal with. It is a lonely world without that cross... yet we are still plague with doubts... anger is hard. It is hard when one's heart has neither peace nor forgiveness.

and what of her? we'll cross the bridge when we can and when we can get there... that is if at that moment, she's free and she wants to... and this heart still believes the same... maybe then we can ask and perhaps explore this in greater detail... but today is not that day, i'm afraid.

Today is a moment we pick up the pieces of our broken life, put it back together and someday endeavour to build our own house.

Rise

Ourselves bind these draped shadows
A cloak of cold dark night

This heart knows rage,
In our anger, its fire grows
Peace ever absent---
These chains that bind
This Darkness we exist in
Perpetuate Night's arms embrace---

We live in draped shadows
Wrap-bind, a cloak of cold night
To ourselves---

As our soul lay broken burning
We find its naked truth:
Weakness open for preying eyes

Truth of words filled with wisdom
Echo in our mind's eye
In its answers we find the weakness
    Lay bare,
    Though draped in shadows,
    wrapped in darkness,
    our soul endeavour:
Rise and challenge!

people have been asking me to reduce my anger... and all the rage in my heart can not be stilled.

indeed, anger has blinded me and it has added to my frustration.

i have for sometime now been searching for peace.

i could not find it not even in that old wooden cross and that is part of the frustration.

i want freedom, is that too much to ask?

What More?

Darkness we wrap ourselves to
No shimmer of light coup!
These horrid stones mark
The Fallen litter this park
of the forgotten,
Here we ramble dragging
cloak in darkness flying
On our horizon, there bright light!
peace, quiet, less plight
and she be there!
Our eyes away! Darkness follows
in this night we wallow
That Old Wooden Cross overshadows,
We find no strength, no peace
Soul exhausted, what more?

Same Old Day

Deathly stillness of mornin' air
In this quiet monotony we dream
Of Her-- a moment of weakness,
A brief interlude in the passing ticks
of Life's horrid torture!
In this darkness, what we hope?
In this night, we disavow Her light
We feel empty-void... miss her,
Awake we realize, she's not here---
Its a new day, the old one never fell.

its finally happened. the last ballot has been counted and a clear victory made by mrs. arroyo. it is now a moment in which, the madness of partisanship should be put aside, a time for a nation to breathe the fresh air of a new hope and the occasion by which we should rebuild and address the needs of our people and of the future.

its that time of day.

is it really so bad ... this path... this madness... these fools would wish to take the Philippines to? A part of me realize that... should it tip towards disaster... then a lot of people will be affected and those people will be the poor... those who can't grab the next plane out. But then, this crucible may just be what the doctor ordered for this country to get a grip, show a bit of maturity and sanity and bring (not return) this nation to civility.

It is with a poignant heart we stand witness to a farce here in the Philippines! When the wheels of Democracy meant to empower people are misused and abused by an opposition hellbent on putting their interest first over a nation, it is a disgrace to this country, a shame to our people and a defacement of democracy!

In no defense to them, at best, their idealism has gotten the better of them and the reality is this road they would like to take us to is putting this nation on the brink of disaster, as if it could not sink further. It is difficult at this point not to be pragmatic. But maybe it is not idealism--- the search for truth that makes these fools endanger our democracy but rather, their own self interests. The times require we move forward. Can't they see that?

Has the political opposition led by Mr. Poe lost this fight? Seriously? Yes they have. They have launched a campaign for a presidency but throughout the fight, they have been disorganized and seemingly unprofessional as opposed to the very organized campaign of Mrs. Arroyo's.

This is not to say, we can blindly put aside questions on irregularities during the election. But the people have had enough, we need a president proclaimed and these little details can be ironed out later when we've restored stability. Instead we have this sword floating over our heads ready to drop at any time. The most important matter at hand is this: our nation must move forward and Democracy must stay secure and vibrant. It IS that time of day.

Our Democracy-loving people deserve to move forward and our leaders need to see that and put aside partisanship and put this nation's interest first. We have had enough! Put aside this mindless squabble and let this nation move forward in peace! More than ever, this country need statesmen, not politicians hell bent on scorch earth tactics that serve no purpose but threaten our nation's stability and hard-earned democracy which they, claim to love. Can't they see that?

Why?

Our Soul lay dying
Self-evident truth denying
What lies in this Heart
Tear everything apart!

Scarce these words encrypt,
Preying eyes easily tipped!
We mind this Madness,
Its absence deep sadness

Ourselves a Fool we be,
No question uttered have we?
She can not utter "yes!" see?!
No question she can agree!

How can a question be voiced?
Lay claim to Her with banner hoist!
Heart knows what deed need be done
What wheels need sprung---

The moment a question is asked
Praying the time is not past
Friendship something more see?!
A question she can certainly agree!

It hurts that these lips be gag
Truth to Her we can not flag
Responsibility comes first---
Such is this curse!

How can I lay claim
When everything else is lame?
When the world is not yet right
We bleed, frustrating plight!

It hurts that these lips be gag
Truth to Her we can not flag
Would she not or would she---
Sweet sounding "yes" decree?

Praying the time is not past
Someone else may first ask
She may say "yes" to him decree
Would we fight or set her free?

The latter more likely
She deserves to be happy
But then, after everything done
Us, She may say "no", we be gone!

It hurts that these lips be gag
Truth to Her we can not flag
"yes", "no"--- does she care?
Would we make a good pair?

She be sane-normal, I'd be loony
The difference isn't puny!
Her heart--- is good.
Thats something I understood

More than Her pretty face
More than that sweet grace
More than Her gorgeous smile,
Sparkling eyes, I can not lie.

"yes", "no"--- does she care?
Would we make a good pair?
How can I lay claim
When everything else is lame?

The world is not yet right
We bleed, this is frustrating plight!

new day

Torrent-rain never stops

The moment is held as Time
Ticks guardianship Luna to Sol
Pass between these turns

Mind travels guided by this heart
Sick of this unrelenting
Madness, feverish nightmares---

Her mem'ry etched undying

In this brief interlude
Our inner voice whispers timeless
Wisdom, this heart acknowledges

The truth: our longing she be here
In this moment's respite
Imagining peace with her

Remembering, wishing, draw strength,

This brief perfection is shattered
Peace is broken, an interlude
Nothing more but imaginings---

A buzz breaks seeming tranquil air,
Day's concerns unrelenting
Mind's ablaze--- trouble's brewing,

Like a roll call this Time Zone begins
To Old Country then New World
Takes us, attention they demand---

In Her Majesty's Kingdom's parlance,
Home-Office places their command---
They have family to keep,

Never ending, come flooding
Torrent-unrelenting
Sol's tour barely begun,

All in this shimmering light
We wish a true moment's respite
Longing for lasting peace with her

In brief imaginings tell her truth,
Is happiness too much to ask?
Voices from a thousand years

Timeless wisdom all remind
“Can you give, what you do not have?”
Never ending, come flooding

Torrent-unrelenting blanket
In this dawn we throw, Will,
Heavy heart our filled strength comes

We but a Lieutenant in this command
What more when Captain we be?
What more when Admiralty we own?

Is happiness too much to ask?

They all have family to keep,
We be but cannon fodder
Nothing to lose 'cept her,

Is a moment's respite too much to ask?

A buzz breaks seeming tranquil air,
Day's concerns unrelenting, Mind's ablaze---
A New Day, does the Old One ever end?

Forever More

If these walls have ears
We'd be free! Truth
Of the matter, the Blue
Shirts are out to get us!

Try as they might
To implicate, their sorry
State of Mind can not
Grasp the obvious truth!

“Sshhsh!” In a whisper,
Bloodshot eyes intently
Stare conviction rises,
“Do you see them?”

“There!” Pointing,
Blank twinkling eyes
Into empty space stare,
Wide grin broken teeth

Breath stench ablaze:
“They come hounding!”
Background laugh, inhuman
A potion of Madness Unbound

“They COME!!!”

Vast vacant air remains,
In mind Chaotic Motion loose
If these walls had ears---
We'd be free!

In black and white mem'ry
A woman in blue, skirt flowing
A slash by the throat! Bitter
Spay of red wine, all over

A quiet laugh given
In a pool of red-wine a cup
Filled pour down throat
Quench this thirst

Wash these stained hands,
Wine sticky, Pour more!
Red wine flows washing
Then nothin. Quiet peace,

“Sshhsh!” In a whisper,
Bloodshot eyes intently
Stare conviction rises,
“Do you see her?”

“There!” Pointing,
Blank twinkling eyes
Into empty space stare,
With wide grin broken

Teeth, breath stench ablaze
“They come hounding!”
Background laugh, inhuman
A potion of Madness Unbound

“They COME!!!”

For these eyes alone see---
Their laughter, mocking echoes
From the other side grows!
Why can't they grasp

The obvious truth? these blue
Shirts are out to get us!
Phantom “pahhh!” “There!!!”
In empty space stare

A woman in blue skirt
Flows heavenly pure
A slash on both wrists!
Reservoir of Red Wine

Flows invitingly
A cup overflows,
We quench this thirst
Down throat we pour

We thirst some more!
Blue Skirt now red wine
Stained, pity nothing more
We wash on pool of wine

Stained hands, Pour more!
Wrists reservoir wine red
Flows washing then nothin.
Quiet peace,

A woman in blue
Ripe belly grows
A smile, heavenly pure
She mocks us!!!

Pregnant belly like fruit
We peel! Sweet nectar
Reservoir of Red Wine
Flows, our cup gush

Overabundance reap!
A taste of young flesh
Filling, Red Wine drink

Merrily, quench this
thirst down throat we pour
Pool of sticky wine stain
Hands we wash

There is nothing, quiet peace!

For these eyes alone see---
Their laughter, mocking echoes
From the other side grows!
Why can't they grasp

The obvious truth? these blue
Shirts are out to get us!
Phantom “pahhh!” “There!!!”
In empty space stare

Try as they might
To implicate their sorry
State of Mind can not grasp
Obvious truth!

All forever more trapped
Within these white padded
Walls mocked eternally!
“Ssshhsssh!”

“There!” Pointing,
Blank twinkling eyes
Into empty space stare,
Wide grin broken teeth

Breath stench ablaze
“They come hounding!”
Background laugh, inhuman
A potion of Madness Unbound

“They COME!!!”

Don't these walls have ears?!
Phantoms in Blue, mocking
Laughing “THEY COME!!!”
All forever more within these

White padded walls mocked,
Trapped eternally, we cower---
Phantoms in blue! A silent shriek,
A whisper given, bloodshot eyes

Intently stare, conviction rises
“We see them! Don't these wall
Have ears? We'd be Free!
Trapped forever more!